The Real-World Price Tag + Toll on Leaders: When Avoidance Gets Expensive

Picking up where we left off, what does it actually mean for leaders after the tough conversation has been set aside without resolution? If you haven’t read our previous weeks’ posts, you can find them HERE.

So, let me tell you about three situations I've watched unfold with clients:

Example 1: The promotion that never happened - A marketing director kept meaning to give her top performer some feedback about presentation skills. This employee was brilliant with strategy but struggled when presenting to executives. When promotion time rolled around, leadership passed her over. She left for a competitor who was willing to invest in her development. Final cost: $80K replacement search, six months of lost productivity, and now they're literally competing against her expertise.

Example 2: The team that imploded - A project manager avoided addressing one team member's consistently negative attitude in meetings. Other team members started dodging collaboration opportunities, productivity tanked, and two people requested transfers. What started as one awkward conversation became a complete team restructure and months of rebuilding trust.

Example 3: The lawsuit that could have been avoided - An HR manager kept putting off documenting performance issues with an employee, hoping things would just improve naturally. When the situation finally escalated and termination became necessary, the lack of documentation led to a wrongful dismissal claim. The settlement? More than two years of that employee's salary.

So, What Changes When You Actually Have These Conversations?

But here's the thing that keeps me passionate about this work: when you shift from avoiding to engaging, everything changes.

Your High Performers Accelerate Their Growth

When you regularly discuss their strengths and stretch opportunities, high performers:

  • Feel valued and invested in

  • Get clarity on their development path

  • Take on challenges with confidence

  • Become advocates for your leadership

  • Stay longer and contribute more

Your Underperformers Get the Support They Need

Clear, kind feedback helps struggling team members:

  • Understand exactly what needs to change

  • Get specific support to improve

  • Feel supported rather than abandoned

  • Either improve their performance or make a graceful transition elsewhere

  • Stop inadvertently frustrating their teammates

Your Solid Contributors Step Into Their Potential

Regular recognition and growth conversations help your reliable team members:

  • Understand their value to the team

  • See clear paths for advancement

  • Take on new challenges with confidence

  • Become more engaged and motivated

  • Develop into your next generation of leaders

You Sleep Better and Lead with Confidence

When difficult conversations become routine:

  • You stop carrying the mental load of unaddressed issues

  • You make decisions based on clear information, not assumptions

  • You build a reputation as a leader who addresses problems directly

  • You focus your energy on growth rather than damage control

  • You model the kind of communication you want to see on your team

Your Team Develops a Culture of Growth

Teams with regular feedback conversations:

  • Address problems before they become crises

  • Support each other's development actively

  • Communicate more openly about challenges

  • Take ownership of their performance

  • Trust that their leader will support their success

Ready to download your free toolkit? Great! Let’s get you having the discussions that you and your team deserve to have.

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    How to Have the Tough Conversations: 3 Shifts to Make Tough Conversations Feel Manageable

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    The Ripple Effect: How Avoiding Tough Conversation Spreads Through Your Team